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Summary : "Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships—one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life: 1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships. 2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are. 3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament. 4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways. 5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control. When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.
Summary : Using the metaphor of the heroic journeydeparture, struggle and returnthe author shows readers the way to psychological and spiritual health.
Summary : We were made to love and be loved. Loving ourselves and others is in our genetic code. It’s nothing other than the purpose of our lives—but knowing that doesn’t make it easy to do. We may find it a challenge to love ourselves. We may have a hard time letting love in from others. We’re often afraid of getting hurt. It is also sometimes scary for us to share love with those around us—and love that isn't shared leaves us feeling flat and unfulfilled. David Richo provides the tools here for learning how to love in evolved adult ways—beginning with getting past the barriers that keep us from loving ourselves, then showing how we can learn to open to love others. He provides wisdom from Buddhism, psychology, and a range of spiritual traditions, along with a wealth of practices both for avoiding the pitfalls that can occur in love relationships and for enhancing the way love shows up in our lives. He then leads us on to love’s inevitable outcome: developing a heart that loves universally and indiscriminately. This transcendent and unconditional love isn’t just for a heroic few, Dave shows, it’s everyone’s magnificent calling.
Summary : Explores the human ability to trust, and argues that people must develop trust in four directions, including toward themselves, toward others, toward life as it is, and toward a higher power or spiritual path in order to maintain healthy relationships and experience emotional well-being.
Summary : Invites readers to examine their relationships from a non-traditional perspective, drawing on western and eastern philosophy and a range of spiritual traditions to demonstrate how to heal oneself and a relationship, break unhealthy cycles, create a spiritual marriage, and establish healthier beliefs. Reprint. 15,000 first printing.
Summary : "Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships-- one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.4. Affection is shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control.When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts-- what Richo calls the five A's-- form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.
Summary : Is there a science to love? In this groundbreaking book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many bestselling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships-until now. Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes. In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: *ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back. *AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. *SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers readers a wealth of advice on how to navigate their relationships more wisely given their attachment style and that of their partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.
Summary : "Am I with the most selfish person alive?" "Am I being selfish when I do the things I want to do?" "If you loved me, you would..." The battle of what "I want" versus what "you want" is intense. Couples are in a constant tug of war, squabbling with each other with no regard for their partner's feelings, with great guilt over their own perceived selfishness, or feeling somewhere in between. And it's costing us our relationships. What About Me? will guide readers through the new terrain of relationships in this era of entitlement, showing how selfishness plays a role and helping you better understand what being selfish really is. Learn to: see beyond what you perceive as selfish requests-your partner's and your own conquer the selfish hot spots that flare up in your relationship understand all the differences, fears, and preferences that come between couples Through anecdotes and quizzes, and drawing from Dr. Jane Greer's more than twenty years of experience in relationship counseling, What About Me? will teach readers what's reasonable to expect of themselves and their partners, equip them with the tools to move from "me" to "we," and get them back on track to happily ever after. "Finally, a simply put yet deeply resonating guide to help us eliminate toxic messages that feed into our relationships! Keep What About Me? next to your bedside and get what you need, immediately!" -Emme, supermodel "What About Me? unabashedly digs deeply into the origins of conflict in relationships and paves the way for resolution, healing, and happiness. This is a book that will serve all of us well." -David Perlmutter, MD, author of Power Up Your Brain: The Neuroscience of Enlightenment
Summary : An explosion of research on bullying has raised our collective awareness of the serious impacts it can have on children. No longer do we accept it as an innocuous rite of passage, just a part of growing up that we grin and bear and grow out of later. But do we grow out of it, or are there lingering effects that last well beyond the school playgrounds and lunchrooms? Is bullying traumatic and, if so, does it last into adult life? Are there life-long consequences or are the effects pretty much shed as people grow? Are some of us more resilient than others? Are there any positive or unexpected outcomes as a result of being bullied (or having been a bully) as a child? In an effort to answer these questions, Bullying Scars describes childhood bullying from the vantage point of those victims, bullies, and bystanders who are now adults; the book discusses how lives have been changed, and explores the range of reactions adults exhibit.The research gathered for this book, through interviews with over 800 people, points out that even adult decision-making is often altered by the victimization they experience as children at the hands of peers, siblings, parents, or educators. Written in an engaging and accessible style that draws heavily from the rich interview data that deLara has collected, this book will be of interest to anyone struggling with the lingering effects of being bullied. Additionally, it is highly relevant to mental health professionals -- counselors, therapists, social workers, clinical psychologists -- working with clients who are dealing with these issues.
Summary : People with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorders are master manipulators; Caretakers fall for them every time. This book helps Caretakers break the cycle and puts them on a new path of personal freedom, discovery, and self-awareness, through the use of real stories and practical suggestions from a seasoned therapist.
Summary : Psychotherapist Richo explores the tendency to transfer potent feelings about people from the past onto the present. The author offers valuable insights and practical guidance on how to recognize and free oneself from this destructive pattern.
Summary : "This practical book introduces and explains an easily accessible assessment tool for adult attachment style, the Attachment Style Interview (ASI). Based on extensive research study, it discusses appropriate interventions and case assessments that can be made to help families in need. Simpler than the Adult Attachment Interview, which requires expert administration, the ASI is an invaluable and evidence-based resource and is particularly useful for multi-agency practitioners working with children and families, including those in adoption and fostering, child safeguarding and therapeutic services. Presenting clear and concise descriptions of the measure and summaries of the attachment models developed, it provides discussions of its relevance for different practice contexts. This text uses a range of worked case studies to illustrate its principles and applications. It details attachment issues in different relationship domains to cover areas of risk and resilience relevant for practice such as: adult depression and anxiety and stress models, partner difficulties including domestic violence, childhood neglect and abuse as a source of attachment problems, parenting and intergenerational transmission of risk, resilience factors, interventions, service application and use in family therapy. Understanding Adult Attachment in Family Relationships provides an important reference for all practitioners working with children, adolescents and families, especially those undertaking further study"--Provided by publisher.
Summary : The author of the bestselling "How to Be an Adult" explains in his characteristic popular style how fear can cripple our ability to take risks in life and how it can be overcome by love. He looks at the deepest roots of fear and suggests practical ways to escape from fear.
Summary : Work with your triggers to find peace in the painful moments and lasting emotional well-being. Psychotherapist David Richo examines the science of triggers and our reactions of fear, anger, and sadness. He helps us understand why our bodies respond before our minds have a chance to make sense of a situation. By looking deeply at the roots of what provokes us--the words, actions, and even sensory elements like smell--we find opportunities to understand the origins of our triggers and train our bodies to remain calm in the face of traumatic experiences. In-the-moment exercises on how to process difficult emotions and physical manifestations are offered throughout the book to cultivate the inner resources necessary to deal with recurring trauma. When we are triggered, Richo writes, "we are being bullied by our own unfinished business." Explore what your body's knee-jerk reactions to trauma can teach you. Triggers: How We Can Stop Reacting and Start Healing acts as a guide to your body's powerful responses, helping you to remain calm under pressure and discover the key to emotional healing.
Summary : Why is it that despite our best efforts, many of us remain fundamentally unhappy and unfulfilled in our lives? In this provocative and inspiring book, David Richo distills thirty years of experience as a therapist to explain the underlying roots of unhappiness—and the surprising secret to finding freedom and fulfillment. There are certain facts of life that we cannot change—the unavoidable "givens" of human existence: (1) everything changes and ends, (2) things do not always go according to plan, (3) life is not always fair, (4) pain is a part of life, and (5) people are not loving and loyal all the time. Richo shows us that by dropping our deep-seated resistance to these givens, we can find liberation and discover the true richness that life has to offer. Blending Western psychology and Eastern spirituality, including practical exercises, Richo shows us how to open up to our lives—including to what is frightening, painful, or disappointing—and discover our greatest gifts.